How Do We Reconcile Emotional Pain & Suffering?

The PoE Concepts: The Fucket Bucket™

The Fucket Bucket™

All of our unfinished emotional business is referred to as our incompletions. These pre-existing emotional disturbances “live on” inside the bucket and cause us to act out.

Self-Esteem Damage

〰️

Self-Esteem Damage 〰️

Painful experiences flow into the Fucket Bucket™ and over time, it gets full. The filling of the bucket accounts for all sorts of forms of acting out. Acting out that becomes "habitual" can include anxiety and depression, conduct disorder, and obsessive-compulsive behavior patterns. These include smoking, drinking, emotional eating, shoplifting, abusing others, bullying, etc. This includes behavior that in all its forms is self-defeating, and self-sabotaging, and can become chronic and toxic to yourself and others.

Grief/Loss

〰️

Grief/Loss 〰️

  • Depression

  • Chronic Overspending

  • Domestic Violence

  • Hoarding

  • Crime

  • Smoking & Vaping

  • Alcohol Addiction

  • Political Unrest

  • Bullying

  • Drug Addiction

  • Co-Dependency

  • Cellphone Addiction

  • Gun Violence

  • Infidelity

  • Molestation And/Or Abuse Of Children

  • Workaholism

  • Failure To Launch Syndrome

  • Anxiety

  • Sex Addiction

  • Eating Disorders

  • Intimacy Avoidance

  • Social Isolation

  • Homophobia

  • Racism

  • OCD

We don’t lose control: we realize at times when we’re acting out that our idea of self-control was an illusion all along. 

When things go my way, nothing is “broken” or needs fixing or gets noticed and identified as a problem.  It’s working, so no problem.  When it doesn’t work, now we can see how it works. You’re getting more of the unwanted impulse force by your acting out, which spawns more acting out, rather than less. The unworkability of that ‘circular loop’ suddenly comes into play, it enters into the space of your Will and the tug of war inside begins.

Grief that is only partially resolved is one very common example.  Shame that’s “leftover” from early childhood abuse, a lingering conflict in an important relationship, or chronic dissatisfaction related to an important unachieved life dream, etc… are all ongoing, “pre-existing” emotional disturbances that “live on” in our Fucket Bucket™ (FB). The FB is where our emotional incompletions live — “inside our hearts and minds.” Over time, if the contents of the bucket aren’t examined and brought to completion, they harden and turn into contempt, moving the person to orient themselves to the world in a destructive way.